Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: FED UP – FIX IT
Don’t let these common mythsblock ...: FED UP – FIX IT Don’t let these common myths block your path to happiness! 1. I’ll be Happier Tomorrow It’s easy to fall in...
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Friday, 5 June 2015
FED UP – FIX IT
Don’t let these common myths
block your path to
happiness!
1. I’ll be Happier Tomorrow
It’s easy to fall
into the trap of thinking happiness will happen once you have achieved all your
goals, but if you do that you will end up concentrating so hard on how much
better life could be that it will stop you appreciating what you have already
got.
How to fix this
blockage:
Postponing happiness
to a future date means you will never enjoy it.
By all means aspire to greater things, but enjoy every minute along the
way. Enjoy your food, smell the roses,
pat a cat, dog or whatever it takes for you to enjoy the day.
2.
It Won’t Last
Are you too afraid to
let yourself be happy because you think life will bring you crashing back
down? You need to realize that if you
don’t take a risk, you will end up missing out.
Life is a gamble and you need to be bold and go for what you want. Just because you were hurt in a previous
relationship or let down in another way, doesn’t mean the same thing will
surely happen again.
How to fix this
blockage:
Stop expecting the
worst, and think positively. If you
expect the worst, it tends to happen.
This is often comes as self-sabotage in relationships or perhaps at a
job interview and the interviewer picks up your negativity. Remember that it is better to have been happy
for a short while than stuck in a familiar, but depressing, situation. You might as well enjoy the good times you
already have.
3.
He has to Change
Example: Sue a young
mother of two, had convinced herself that if her husband, Steve, was just a bit
more ambitious, worked harder and secured a promotion, she would have
everything. However, if, like Simon,
your partner is perfectly content with his life and job the way they are,
spending your life waiting for him to change is setting yourself up to feel let
down when he doesn’t alter his life.
3a. They have Got to Change
How to fix this
blockage:
Making your happiness
conditional on someone else means you are avoiding taking responsibility for
your own feelings and ambitions. Of
course it is only fair to expect your partner to do their fair share of the
housework or to be affectionate towards you, but you have to decide whether
this is an important change that could make your relationship better. Perhaps you are just using it as an
excuse. If a partner or friend does not
make you happy, either learn to live with that person or decide if you want him
or her in your life at all.
4.
I Don’t Like Myself
When you are unhappy,
it is easy to think everything in your life is wrong. The only solution seems to be a big change –
give up your job, relationship, move house – to make a fresh start. Perhaps if you were not bothered that you
have put on weight, you wouldn’t row with your partner because nothing fits
anymore.
How to fix this
blockage:
Try and
work out the real reason you are feeling down.
Next learn to like, respect and value yourself as you presently are –
faults and all. For example, if you are
truly unhappy about your current job, stand in front of a mirror each morning,
smile and confidently say, 10 times, “I am good at what I do.” If you have tried everything in that
department and still feel stuck in a miserable job – start looking or training
for another job whilst you have current employment. If it is your relationship that is the
current problem a suggested book that may assist is “Really Relating - by David
Jansen & Margaret Newman, available from Dymocks Bookshops, Angus and
Robertson and some libraries. If that
fails, reassess your relationship, perhaps it is truly time to move on.
5.
They Owe Me
Having a chip on your
shoulder about how much praise you deserve from others can have a negative
effect – if those expectations are not fulfilled, you will be
disappointed. If you become too obsessed
with getting what you think you deserve out of life, you can also lose sight of
how much you already been given.
Example: Janice 30, was convinced
her life had been difficult and, because of that, felt she deserved more
success at work. Although she had a
high-powered job, she still expected constant praise and got depressed if she
did not get it.
How to fix this
blockage:
Be your own best
critic. You know when you have done
something well, so give yourself credit for it rather that searching for
appreciation from other people. There is
nothing wrong with having pride of a job well done. Modesty has it place in this world, but do
not go overboard on it.
6.
I Don’t Deserve It
One of the most
common beliefs is that happiness is something you have to work hard for and
earn – and many people feel they don’t deserve to be happy. Being depressed all the time is not going to
help. Think it much easier it is to cheer
up a friend who is going through a down period if you yourself are feeling
good.
How to fix this
blockage:
Do not feel guilty
about being happy. Remember that a good
mood can actually be infectious and the better you feel, the easier it is to
spread some of that job around to your friends and family. It also works the other work – sadness and
depression is also infectious. Please
don not spread that one around – there is already enough of that in this world.
7.
I Wish I Looked Different
There is probably
something about your appearance that you really don not like. Whether you think your nose is too big and
plastic surgery is the answer, or you are desperate to be two sizes slimmer or
bigger. It is easy to fall into the trap
of thinking that by changing the way you look you will automatically make
yourself happier. Unless you are
seriously deformed or disfigured by an accident – plastic surgery is not the
answer.
How to fix this
blockage:
It is important to keep these ideas in
proportion and stop giving yourself a hard time about the way you look. Remember that when it comes to looks and
personality, nobody is perfect, so stop trying to be. Acceptance of yourself – of your looks and
your situation – is a huge part of being happy
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Chakras - Spiritual Development
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Chakras - Spiritual Development: CHAKRAS T he intent of this report is to offer information and guidance to help you with your spiritual development. In the event that...
Chakras - Spiritual Development
CHAKRAS
The intent of this report is to offer
information and guidance to help you with your spiritual development. In the
event that you use any of the information in this report, the author assumes no
responsibility for your actions and/or consequences arising from them.
I had a theory about the chakras, that a particular chakra is linked with our age and that each chakra (apart from the heart chakra) has a seven year period – I found my theory to be reinforced when I picked up a book called The Enneagram for the Spirit by Mary Horsely.
The heart is the middle chakra which sits between the top three universal or higher self chakras and the bottom three or ego self chakras. As the heart is linked with love, a person may be “in” that chakra for 21 years as there is physical love, self love, and universal/unconditional love. OSHO also mentions the different levels of love stating that most people get “stuck” at the lowest level, that of sexual or physical love, which is not really love at all. The highest level being compassion and unconditional love – “doing something for the sheer joy of it without any expectation.”
0-7 years base chakra – the red base chakra is all to do with basic survival and security. From birth to about 7 it is said that we are very open channels. It is between these ages that we learn the basic survival skills, to walk , communicate, feed ourselves, clean ourselves, dress ourselves etc. I believe it is the Jesuits who have the saying, “Give me a boy until he is 7 and I will show you the man”.
7-14 years sacral chakra – the orange sacral chakra is linked with desires, procreation, creativity, courage. This links in with the age range as it around this age that puberty and hormonal changes start to kick in.
14-21 – the yellow solar plexus chakra is our power centre, our furnace. At this age we start to rebel, to have power issues/struggles in order to try and find some sense of individuality or identity. We are trying to find out who we are and our own purpose, our individual way of expressing ourselves but we lack the experiences of life at this stage to have confidence in ourselves, so there is this push/pull energy of pleasing the self and pleasing others in order to fit in and feel more confident. It’s also linked with the ups and downs of the emotions – yellow being sunshine energy. When the sun is shining (our solar plexus chakra is balanced), we are radiant and happy. When it is not we become gloomy and can feel a bit sad and sorry for ourselves.
21 – 42 – so now we get to the all important green/pink heart chakra. We go through the phases of being in a relationship, enjoying sharing the physical aspects of love. Many people, as OSHO said, remain stuck at this level. Soon after there is a feeling of emptiness, so we fill it with more physical or material pleasures continuing the cycle. Some of us however, begin to realise, “well, that’s all well and good, all very nice, BUT, like any other earthly pleasure – it’s short lived”.
So we move on to making our own happiness, loving ourselves. Some of us remain at this level, feeling that “well I’m alright Jack, I’m a good person, I don’t depend on anyone for my happiness, if I want something I can get it for myself. I don’t go round hurting anybody or being a burden, etc, etc,” There can also be a tendency to become self righteous at this point.
Somewhere along that route though, some of us start to make a connection with others, a deeper connection and realisation that there are living beings on this planet who are not happy, fulfilled, content – who haven’t reached that level yet - some don’t care or don’t want to. They may do in their next lifetime or in a few hundred lifetimes. But some do. Empathy and sympathy for our fellow living beings becomes stronger, the realisation that we are all interconnected becomes more and more engrained. When this level of love occurs, it is very difficult to judge another being, to hurt another being, to condemn another being, because as soon as we do, we feel the ripple of our actions as strongly as the being it is inflicted on. We realise that people are not being hurtful consciously – for if they truly knew and were interconnected to the universe, they would not behave that way intentionally. This level is sometimes triggered by parenthood or some similar act of caring for some living being – the act of unconditional love. We don’t give up or turn our backs on someone or something because they make a mistake, because they fail their exams, because our pets mess the house, because the plants drop leaves or need continual watering. What do we do? Instead of giving less, we give more - more love, more guidance, more support – and the universe, as always will balance things out. I heard once, that we are never given more than we can handle, I do believe this. It goes hand in hand with the phrase “that which doesn’t kill me, can only make me stronger” (or words to that effect). So we start to balance our own happiness with the happiness of others realising the interconnectedness of that happiness. If we do something that makes another person happy, without attachment to the outcome, we will inevitably feel happy ourselves. The feeling of it’s just nice to be nice. That includes being nice to ourselves – striving for the happiness of all living beings – the universal love. Gaining that balance however, is much easier said than done! This is the first step of working on a universal level.
42- 49 As we move into our forties we encounter the blue throat chakra. The phrase life begins at 40 comes to mind. The throat chakra is all about being able to speak truth – not as easy as it sounds! By truth it doesn’t mean blurting out whatever we personally feel, that’s energy coming from the lower ego self chakras. Speaking spiritual truths, universal truths – being able to speak in a way that empowers others, that has a healing effect, an inspiring effect. Think of motivational speakers – they have an energy about them that draws huge numbers of people to them. Also, singers who touch the lives and souls of many people with their voices. This is universal energy – many artists pen a bestselling song in 15 minutes. Why? Because they are merely the channel. They allow the universe to work through them and they know this. They are at a level where they want to serve the universe. They open themselves up and allow themselves to be a channel or a vessel.
49 – 56 By the time we reach our late forties we are ready to work with the indigo third eye chakra. This is all about sharing insights, inner vision and foresight. Again on a universal level. Being willing to serve spirit or the universe. Sharing regardless of a person’s socio economic status, and all the other labels we place on individuals.
56 + By now we become as enlightened as can be in our physical bodies, we reach the golden/white crown chakra. There are those who have moments or even phases of enlightenment (very difficult to put into words!). My best description is the feeling of being merged with everything, a sense that you are here but not here. To talk or move at this point breaks it, which is why enlightenment is such a personal personal experience. And that’s just my take on it. When we do this though, an overwhelming sense of inner peace and contentment radiates from us and around us, permeating and positively affecting all those that come in contact with us.
This is just what has flowed and is by no means an exhaustive explanation on chakras. Some of us will find our “soul purpose” in a particular chakra – that chakra may be stronger throughout this life time from birth, which may well explain people who have amazing gifts from a very early age or the ability to reach the masses but without really knowing why. I was about to start talking about soul contracts and lessons etc. Maybe that will be another time!
I had a theory about the chakras, that a particular chakra is linked with our age and that each chakra (apart from the heart chakra) has a seven year period – I found my theory to be reinforced when I picked up a book called The Enneagram for the Spirit by Mary Horsely.
The heart is the middle chakra which sits between the top three universal or higher self chakras and the bottom three or ego self chakras. As the heart is linked with love, a person may be “in” that chakra for 21 years as there is physical love, self love, and universal/unconditional love. OSHO also mentions the different levels of love stating that most people get “stuck” at the lowest level, that of sexual or physical love, which is not really love at all. The highest level being compassion and unconditional love – “doing something for the sheer joy of it without any expectation.”
0-7 years base chakra – the red base chakra is all to do with basic survival and security. From birth to about 7 it is said that we are very open channels. It is between these ages that we learn the basic survival skills, to walk , communicate, feed ourselves, clean ourselves, dress ourselves etc. I believe it is the Jesuits who have the saying, “Give me a boy until he is 7 and I will show you the man”.
7-14 years sacral chakra – the orange sacral chakra is linked with desires, procreation, creativity, courage. This links in with the age range as it around this age that puberty and hormonal changes start to kick in.
14-21 – the yellow solar plexus chakra is our power centre, our furnace. At this age we start to rebel, to have power issues/struggles in order to try and find some sense of individuality or identity. We are trying to find out who we are and our own purpose, our individual way of expressing ourselves but we lack the experiences of life at this stage to have confidence in ourselves, so there is this push/pull energy of pleasing the self and pleasing others in order to fit in and feel more confident. It’s also linked with the ups and downs of the emotions – yellow being sunshine energy. When the sun is shining (our solar plexus chakra is balanced), we are radiant and happy. When it is not we become gloomy and can feel a bit sad and sorry for ourselves.
21 – 42 – so now we get to the all important green/pink heart chakra. We go through the phases of being in a relationship, enjoying sharing the physical aspects of love. Many people, as OSHO said, remain stuck at this level. Soon after there is a feeling of emptiness, so we fill it with more physical or material pleasures continuing the cycle. Some of us however, begin to realise, “well, that’s all well and good, all very nice, BUT, like any other earthly pleasure – it’s short lived”.
So we move on to making our own happiness, loving ourselves. Some of us remain at this level, feeling that “well I’m alright Jack, I’m a good person, I don’t depend on anyone for my happiness, if I want something I can get it for myself. I don’t go round hurting anybody or being a burden, etc, etc,” There can also be a tendency to become self righteous at this point.
Somewhere along that route though, some of us start to make a connection with others, a deeper connection and realisation that there are living beings on this planet who are not happy, fulfilled, content – who haven’t reached that level yet - some don’t care or don’t want to. They may do in their next lifetime or in a few hundred lifetimes. But some do. Empathy and sympathy for our fellow living beings becomes stronger, the realisation that we are all interconnected becomes more and more engrained. When this level of love occurs, it is very difficult to judge another being, to hurt another being, to condemn another being, because as soon as we do, we feel the ripple of our actions as strongly as the being it is inflicted on. We realise that people are not being hurtful consciously – for if they truly knew and were interconnected to the universe, they would not behave that way intentionally. This level is sometimes triggered by parenthood or some similar act of caring for some living being – the act of unconditional love. We don’t give up or turn our backs on someone or something because they make a mistake, because they fail their exams, because our pets mess the house, because the plants drop leaves or need continual watering. What do we do? Instead of giving less, we give more - more love, more guidance, more support – and the universe, as always will balance things out. I heard once, that we are never given more than we can handle, I do believe this. It goes hand in hand with the phrase “that which doesn’t kill me, can only make me stronger” (or words to that effect). So we start to balance our own happiness with the happiness of others realising the interconnectedness of that happiness. If we do something that makes another person happy, without attachment to the outcome, we will inevitably feel happy ourselves. The feeling of it’s just nice to be nice. That includes being nice to ourselves – striving for the happiness of all living beings – the universal love. Gaining that balance however, is much easier said than done! This is the first step of working on a universal level.
42- 49 As we move into our forties we encounter the blue throat chakra. The phrase life begins at 40 comes to mind. The throat chakra is all about being able to speak truth – not as easy as it sounds! By truth it doesn’t mean blurting out whatever we personally feel, that’s energy coming from the lower ego self chakras. Speaking spiritual truths, universal truths – being able to speak in a way that empowers others, that has a healing effect, an inspiring effect. Think of motivational speakers – they have an energy about them that draws huge numbers of people to them. Also, singers who touch the lives and souls of many people with their voices. This is universal energy – many artists pen a bestselling song in 15 minutes. Why? Because they are merely the channel. They allow the universe to work through them and they know this. They are at a level where they want to serve the universe. They open themselves up and allow themselves to be a channel or a vessel.
49 – 56 By the time we reach our late forties we are ready to work with the indigo third eye chakra. This is all about sharing insights, inner vision and foresight. Again on a universal level. Being willing to serve spirit or the universe. Sharing regardless of a person’s socio economic status, and all the other labels we place on individuals.
56 + By now we become as enlightened as can be in our physical bodies, we reach the golden/white crown chakra. There are those who have moments or even phases of enlightenment (very difficult to put into words!). My best description is the feeling of being merged with everything, a sense that you are here but not here. To talk or move at this point breaks it, which is why enlightenment is such a personal personal experience. And that’s just my take on it. When we do this though, an overwhelming sense of inner peace and contentment radiates from us and around us, permeating and positively affecting all those that come in contact with us.
This is just what has flowed and is by no means an exhaustive explanation on chakras. Some of us will find our “soul purpose” in a particular chakra – that chakra may be stronger throughout this life time from birth, which may well explain people who have amazing gifts from a very early age or the ability to reach the masses but without really knowing why. I was about to start talking about soul contracts and lessons etc. Maybe that will be another time!
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Father's Day Giveaway
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Father's Day Giveaway: Origins of Father's Day Father’s Day is held on the 3 rd Sunday in June in the UK that is the 21 st this year in case you forget!...
Father's Day Giveaway
Origins of Father's Day
Father’s Day is held on the 3rd Sunday in June in
the UK that is the 21st this year in case you forget! A day where fathers and grandfathers are
allowed (mostly) put their feet up and get spoilt rotten.
Father’s day as we know it today is not even
a 100 years old and was established by Sonora Louise Smart Dodd from
Washington. However it also believed that it began much earlier than that, in
fact over 4,000 years ago in Babylon. A father’s
day message was found in ruins in the form of a card made from clay, a boy
named Elmesu had carved into it his wishes for good health and a long life to
his father.
However you don’t need to go to those lengths and start drying
your clay out, as asktheanswer.com are giving away 10 personalized Fathers Day cards from Moonpig, and delivered
in good time to lucky winners.
To be in with a chance, all you need to do is answer the
following question and email your answer to hello@asktheanswer.com.
Winners will be contacted on Monday 8th
June.
Question: Which tarot reader has the pin number 400020. Answer can be found on www.asktheanswer.com
Good Luck!
Thursday, 4 June 2015
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Solo Weddings - Could this happenin the UK? In t...
Ask The Answer Community Blog Spot: Solo Weddings - Could this happenin the UK?
In t...: Solo Weddings - Could this happen in the UK? In this day and age as we all know, you don’t need a partner to have a baby, a sperm ban...
In t...: Solo Weddings - Could this happen in the UK? In this day and age as we all know, you don’t need a partner to have a baby, a sperm ban...
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